Bullets & Bagels

The following:

Text: IM chat

TOD: Morning.

Where: somewhere in America

Who: Jose/Ziti

zitibakedbossa: What up son?

JoseJoseJose: chillin. you?

zitibakedbossa: what's up? I think I left my zune cable at your res.

JoseJoseJose: yeah. I got it

zitibakedbossa: good look

zitibakedbossa: bagels this morning?

JoseJoseJose: yessir! panera?

zitibakedbossa: yep. your babe usually works in the a.m.

JoseJoseJose: oh word? Nice. I'm going to hav to get splashy. lol

zitibakedbossa: you're wild. you know what I miss? a couple of winters ago they had the tomato bisque. Son! That shit was like liquid pizza! I used to run in there with this bird I knew.

JoseJoseJose: bisque?

zitibakedbossa: yeah. bisque.

JoseJoseJose: zee youre a funny guy. bisque? what hood dude eats bisque? youre kinda uppity. lol

zitibakedbossa: fuck you. lol. Actually, double fuck you. lol.

JoseJoseJose: Go ahead with your bisque story you uppity muthafucker. lol.

zitibakedbossa: ya mama is an uppity muthafucker. take that.

JoseJoseJose: go ahead with your story man.

zitibakedbossa: wasn't a story. they just had this bisque and the shit was good.

JoseJoseJose: I thought you said there was a babe involved?

zitibakedbossa: ohhhhhhhhhh. I was saying that I used to fly in there with this babe---when they had the bisque.

JoseJoseJose: you was f***ing her?

zitibakedbossa: Nah son. She was fine, but that would have been a whole bunch of problems. She was just my bisque buddy.

JoseJoseJose: She was hot? fuck that. she would have been my butt buddy. lol. lol.

JoseJoseJose: who was it?

zitibakedbossa: Miranda.

JoseJoseJose: the puerto ricn chick? what the fuck? are you serious? that girl is baddddddddd. I would have been all over that!

zitibakedbossa: Ha! you're stupid. Oh, she's dope. just not worth the trouble. I'm good.

JoseJoseJose: Youre good? Nah muthafucker you ain't good, you're gay!

zitibakedbossa: Gay! Fuck you. Ya mama's gay. Ya mama's gay like Ellen. Ya mama's gay like Billie Jean King.

JoseJoseJose: lol

JoseJoseJose: fuck you.

zitibakedbossa: LOL! Why I gotta be gay, just because I didn't give the chick the business? Some shit just ain't worth it. Some chicks are just nice to look at.

JoseJoseJose: Yeah. Youre right.

JoseJoseJose: You sure you aint gay?

JoseJoseJose: lol

zitibakedbossa: Is ya mama gay? Matter of fact, isn't your girl gay? On the low? Isn't she just using you as a "moustache"? LOL.

zitibakedbossa: I bet that chick eats more rug than a fucking dust mite! LOL. she's gay like a sunny day!

JoseJoseJose: lol. she ain't gay. TRUST ME.

zitibakedbossa: trust DEEZ. You guys arent f***ing. You get your nails done together, thats it. The only thing you're doing together is picking out a clear coat for the mani/pedi.

zitibakedbossa: LOL

zitibakedbossa: LOL

zitibakedbossa: LOL

zitibakedbossa: LOL

zitibakedbossa: LOL

JoseJoseJose: lol. your funny. Whatever man. All Im saying is that you have the babe in the palm of your hand and you dont go the extra mile.

zitibakedbossa: keyword="extra".

zitibakedbossa: dude, are we getting bagels or what?

JoseJoseJose: Yeah. be there in 15.

zitibakedbossa: Cool.

JoseJoseJose: Hey if we see Miri, I'll break the news of your gayness to her. lol.

zitibakedbossa: Hey, If we see ya mama I'll break the news of her gayness to her. NEWS FLASH: "This just in: JOSE'S MOM GAY LIKE A FEMALE RAPPER.....NEWS AT 11!"

zitibakedbossa: LOL!

JoseJoseJose: we got the same mom.

zitibakedbossa: fuck you, clear coat.

The END.